Lord of the Flies

If only. I had the distinctly unpleasant experience of being woken up at 5am by a mosquito dive-bombing my ear while staying at the supposedly-nice-but-actually-a-bit-dilapidated Bilderberg Parkhotel in Rotterdam. After 20 minutes of hunting, including going back to bed after convincing myself it was a dream only to be dive-bombed again, I eventually spotted and swatted the offending skeeter. I should have been a bit more suspicious after casually dispatching a one earlier on in the evening and given the room a more thorough search. But come on, it's November, all the skeeters should be... Well, wherever they go in the winter.

I was stunned therefore to find another four (at least, those are just the ones I saw) buzzing round when I got up and opened the curtain. Given all that I think I got away fairly lightly with only one bite, although oddly it didn't start itching until a full 36 hours after I left the hotel so might not have been anything to do with those ones at all. Needless to say, nobody else had any mosquitoes in their rooms, despite us all being on the same floor and within a few rooms of each other.

Naturally, I immediately suspected the people responsible for the plagues we suffered from a few years back but it's quite hard to pin anything definite on them. They're cunning that way.